


The Herald

by Ophiel



Series: Lyrium and Faith [4]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-01
Updated: 2015-10-01
Packaged: 2018-04-24 07:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4909990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ophiel/pseuds/Ophiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Evelyn returns to Haven after cementing an alliance with the Templars. Feeling broken and shaken to the core, she finally brings herself to become the Herald, despite knowing that she is the most inappropriate person to do so.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Herald

Evelyn gasped in pain and winced from the physician's needle. She sat in her tent in the Inquisition encampment. By the light of the brazier, with rain still pattering the tent, the physician stitched up a wound on her shoulder with catgut. Evelyn bit her lip biting back the pain. She faced the back of the tent, her robe pulled off her shoulder. Around the brazier were Solas, Varric and Cassandra.

"We can confirm that the Lord Seeker and this… Elder one, have plans for Orlais," Cassandra was saying as she stood by the brazier, warming herself, her arms crossed sternly before her. "We found papers in that strange room, including the one pinned into Empress Celene's bust with a knife. Now you also say that you foresee a demon army?"

"Yes," Evelyn said. "Envy spoke of this in the Fade."

"Then we must find a way to stop the Elder One," Solas said firmly. He stood apart from the rest, though he too was troubled. "To assassinate the Empress of Orlais is one thing, but nothing can stop him with an army of demons at his back."

"I don't think anyone was going to suggest we let him do it, Chuckles," Varric said, lounging on a low bench as he calibrated his crossbow. His head was wrapped in bandages.

"The question is how," Evelyn asked as the physician finished the last stitch. She winced and pulled on her robe once more, fastening it as she stood up. The physician took his leave. "How could this Elder One bind so many demons? Is he a mage?"

"Sufficient magic would allow the binding of multiple entities, yes," Solas said. "To bind an army, however…"

"We cannot take this lightly," Evelyn sighed. "But we cannot act for now, we know too little."

"So now we wait for the other shoe to drop," Varric said. "That's going to be fun."

"Now we bring the Templars back and seal the Breach," Cassandra said firmly. "Ser Barris and the Knight Lieutenants will accompany us ahead of the others. They are the best of their order, such as remains. They should be able to suppress the Breach sufficiently."

"So few of them," Evelyn said wearily."I hope it's enough, or all this would have been for naught."

"Cheer up, Sparky," Varric chuckled, shouldering Bianca. "Think positive, that's what I always say as if this moment."

Evelyn chuckled at that. "I will. I'm tired, I think. Perhaps it's best we turned in."

Cassandra and Varric said their good nights, but Solas lingered. As the tent flap closed, Evelyn looked at Solas. "Not tired, Solas?" She asked, sitting down on her cot and adjusting her bed roll.

Solas squatted down in front of her. "Would you like to discuss your journey into the Fade?" He asked.

Evelyn blinked at him and smiled. "I'm fine, Solas," she assured him. "Envy tried to take me but failed and we killed him."

"That in itself is a miracle. Envy is a powerful demon. It is desire unrequited and perverted. It seeks to wear the lives of others. It wore down the Lord Seeker. But not you."

"I had help," Evelyn replied, turning her attention to smoothing out her bedroll. "Cole, the fade-touched boy, wherever he is. Without him-"

"You would not be you," Solas finished.

"I already do not feel like me," she smiled wrily. "I feel like I've seen seen a glimpse of my future. And I don't like it." Solas was quiet. Evelyn found the words tumbling out of the her. "I must become worthy. But what is that? In the nightmare, I... My words were law, life and death. I did what I wanted, no matter the cost - be it friends or enemies. Is that me? What frightens me is that I think it might be."

"You did what had to be done," Solas said.

"And doomed the mages to servitude," Evelyn said. "Now I'll make Denham pay for what he's done. And the Lord Seeker. Those who have crossed me so far... And, Maker's tears, I will do it with no hesitation." She frowned, her voice was hard as she remembered the searing pain on her face. What had she done in retaliation? She had burned Envy for hurting her. Burned it and watched it writhe, holding Cassandra's killing blow until Envy screamed it's final breath. Were it not for Cole's words...

"You are the Herald," Solas said. "The one who leads because no one else is willing. Such is the burden of the power that you must wield. And it does not always allow mercy. Why do you hate yourself for that? To do what must be done, no matter the cost, it is a rare gift." He smiled faintly. "You need rest," he said, standing up."Perhaps it might be best for you to... sleep."

Evelyn found herself laying down unbidden, her eyes heavy with sleep. It was within a breath that she drifted off into slumber, dreaming dreams of her childhood under under a purple sky filled with stars, where no troubles found her and she was at peace. All the while, a shadow on a hill watched her, making her feel safer.

The War Room in Haven's Chantry was dimly lit by candles in the sconces. The advisors were already there waiting when Cassandra and Evelyn walked in. Evelyn still spared her arm, not wanting to rip open the stitches. They sat down to debrief Cullen, Leliana and Josephine. "What you found in the Captain's office is abominable," Cullen said, steepling his hands as he frowned with concern. "It indicates that the officers blighted their knights with red lyrium even before they knew that the Lord Seeker was a demon."

"And they did so willingly," Cassandra added.

Leliana sighed. "Which put us in a position to demand more of the Templars," she said. "But you still gave them a free alliance. You should have consulted us first."

"And I was supposed to keep them in the courtyard while I sent a message?" Evelyn asked. "The Breach does not wait for us."

"Still, an alliance with the Templars was our original goal," Josephine said. "May we instead discuss their imminent arrival?"

"The veterans were with us in our column," Evelyn said. "Some stayed to gather the rest of the Templars for mobilisation before departing. We should wait for them. In the meantime, we should secure our-"

There was a gust of smoke as Cole appeared on the table, playing idly with an ebony map marker. "They're already on their way," Cole said calmly.

"Maker!" Cullen burst out and drew his sword.

"Wait!" Evelyn cried, rising to her feet, seeing a sword in Cassandra's hand as well. Evelyn grabbed Cassandra's wrist. "Stop!"

"I came with you to help," Cole said. "I wanted to tell you but you were busy."

"Call the guards! This creature is-" Cassandra began.

"This creature is why I am still me," Evelyn said firmly. "When the Envy Demon tried to claim me, I couldn't escape. He helped me! Even when fighting Envy, he was there!"

"Was he? But this creature is-"

" _Whatever he is_ , he has helped." She looked at Cullen, who reluctantly lowered his blade.

"Like you do," said Cole. "You help people when they would have died. I want to do that. I can help."

"How altruistic of you," Cassandra's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"A moment, Cassandra," Leliana said. "I would like to hear how he plans to help."

"Yes. What kind of help?" Cullen asked, not sheathing his sword as Cole stepped off the table.

"The hole in the sky, it's too loud for spirits to think. It pulls, pushes out pain. I want to close it. I'm hard to see, I can kill things that would hurt people. I won't get in the way, I promise."

"He saved my life in Therinfall," Evelyn said to Cassandra and Cullen.

"But what does it want?" Cassandra asked.

"I think… he really does want to help."

Cole smiled slightly. "I won't be in the way; no notice, no trouble. Tiny, until you want someone to see."

"You're not honestly suggesting that we give him run of the camp?" Cullen asked.

"Not freely, perhaps," Josephine said. "But it seems a waste to- Hold on!" She blinked as Cole was gone.

"Where did he go?" Cassandra exclaimed.

"He does that," Evelyn said reassuringly. "You'll get used to it."

"Ooh, we should get him to teach us," Leliana smiled. "It looks like a useful trick. I will have people watch the boy, but for now, let's not get distracted from the Breach."

"We wait for the veterans to arrive then," Evelyn said. "After that, we close it, and end this at last." She looked down at her palm, which flickered green through her leather glove. She closed her palm into a fist and willed the mark silent.

"We have some time, then. It will take them at least a day to arrive," Cassandra said. "I will see to our preparations."

Evelyn moved to walk out as Leliana and Josephine passed, but she paused when she felt a hand on her wrist, holding her back. She looked back at Cullen as the door to the War Room closed. His fingers dropped from her wrist. "Rylon told me about your injuries," he said. "Are you alright?"

"They're healing," she said. "I know some healing magic that should speed things along. I will recover."

"And the demon? This Envy-"

"I would prefer not to talk about it," she cut in, her voice harsher than she expected. "I mean, Solas has already… I spoke to him. It's disconcerting to discuss."

"They tried to break you," he murmured. "But you survived. I'm glad." He hesitated. "That you're alright," he said. Awkwardness bloomed between them. He rubbed the back of his neck the way he always did when he was uncertain of what to do. "If you... need to speak to anyone, you could - I mean, I'm here. It's not military advice, but I do know a little of helping mages."

She smiled warmly and tiptoed to kiss him affectionately on the cheek. "You're sweet, Cullen," she said with a chuckle. "Like a petit four! I'll keep you in mind if I feel troubled." He stared at her in shock before the glow of a blush spread from his neck to his cheeks.

That was the truth. No games here. She felt stripped naked by Envy and hadn't the heart to be anything other than what she was at this point. She headed to the door and stepped outside. "Come, I want you to meet Ser Barris. He's a good man."

"Er, right, Barris," he cleared his throat. "Let's go then."

 

++++

 

Night had settled over Haven. Evelyn had spent most of the day sleeping, recovering from Therinfal Redoubt. She awoke, blinking in the light of her fireplace. Her head felt like it was stuffed with straw and her mouth was dry. How long has she been asleep? Her dreams had been painful. Nightmares of Envy, burning pain and eyes full of accusation glaring at her. She groaned and sat up to the welcomed sight of a tub of hot water behind a screen.

There was a note on the table. "I just had the thought that you might like this," she read. It was signed by Josephine. She smiled and disrobed quickly, tossing her sleeping robes onto the bed before stepping into the bath.

She moaned with pleasure, sinking into the water, her skin turning pink from the heat. The bath rejuvenated her, until she raised her arm to lay it on the lip of the tub. She winced at the pain from her wound. "Blast," she muttered, raising her hand to the wound. A gentle glow of magic flickered in the tub as she healed herself slightly. She was better at throwing lightning and brewing herbs than at healing magic. She never had the quiet of mind for it. She tried to now, pushing aside thought of Envy's nightmare.

There was a knock on the cottage door behind her. Evelyn gave a startled gasp. "Maker," she breathed. With Josephine still in her mind, she said, "Come in."

The door opened. It took her a moment to realize that the screen was arranged to block the window. "Herald, the Lieutenants are- Oh Maker!"

"Really, Cullen?" Evelyn exclaimed, not turning around. Water splashed as she covered her chest with her arms, blushing to the roots of her hair. "Why didn't you knock?"

"I did knock! You said to come in!"

"I - I thought you were someone else!" She glanced at him over her shoulder. He had his back turned, she couldn't see his face over the fur.

"I'll - I'll come back another time." He turned to leave. Evelyn felt the cold blow into the room as he opened the door.

"Wait," she said, trying to steady her voice. Why was she panicking? She cleared her throat. "Shut the door."

She sensed his hesitation, but the door shut. "Really, I can come back," he said.

"You don't have to worry. It's not like we're courting or - or anything."

"Er. Right."

"You're just… giving me a report. And I want to hear this. Just don't turn around!" She recalled his breath on her arms. The man unwound her just by standing close and he wasn't even trying. "What's this about Lieutenants?"

"What?"

"Lieutenants, Cullen," she repeated. "Are they here?"

"Oh! Yes, the last of the Lieutenants arrived this afternoon. You were still sleeping. Adan recommended we let you rest. They've been dosing lyrium the whole day."

"We have lyrium?" Evelyn asked, surprised.

"Josephine arranged purchase."

"Thank goodness. I thought we didn't have any."

"We had some before, but not enough for all of them. There is a problem, however."

Evelyn sighed. "Of course there is."

"We're getting some mages from Redcliffe, fleeing the mobilisation. They don't have much details as to where the Magister was taking them, except that they were to leave. I think these lot escaped before the Magister finally left. As of now, Redcliffe Castle stands empty."

"That's good news, is it not?" she asked.

"At first. There are tensions now between them and the Templars. I thought that as the Herald, it would be best for you to speak with them."

Evelyn let out a breath of annoyance. "I will not have them repeat Redcliffe here," she said firmly. "Don't turn around." There was the sound of water splashing as Evelyn stood up, bath water running in rivulets down her body and into the tub. She saw Cullen shift uneasily at the door. "Am I making you uncomfortable?" Evelyn asked, heading behind the screen to her chest, looking for fresh robes.

"That's not quite the word I would use," Cullen replied.

Evelyn chuckled as she dressed. Cullen waited quietly for a moment, then he finally spoke. "Did you sleep well?" he asked her. "No nightmares?"

She froze, her heart sinking. "There were," she said simply.

"They will pass."

"Will they?"

"Yes. It may take a while, but they will. Just try not to let it change you too greatly."

"I am not worried that they do," she murmured quietly. "I'm worried that they don't." She turned to look at him, his back still to her. There were rumours about the Circle of Ferelden where she knew he served before Kirkwall. The Circle has been a hair's breadth from the Rite of Annulment when it was overrun with abominations. It was an event that enchanters in other Circles studied as a warning. She looked at Cullen, realizing that hers was not the only soul sent to the anvil. She stepped up to him, her blue eyes meeting his gentle golden eyes. "Thank you, Cullen," she said quietly, touching his face gratefully.

He smiled at her, the scar at the top of his lip moving in way she found delightful. "Have faith, Evelyn."

"I should," she smiled, feeling her heart flutter in his smile. She cleared her throat and stepped away from him. She picked up her staff from where it leaned against her bed and set it in its clasp on her coat. "Let's go, then."

"Right," he said. Then he paused, looking at her. "Your hair is wet," he pointed out.

"You startled me and it got wet."

"It's cold, you'll fall ill." He looked so serious when he spoke, Evelyn couldn't help but laugh, her voice tittering in the air, carried by the night breeze. "I'm serious."

"I know," she covered her mouth to stop the laughter as she held her middle. "I'm sorry. Yes, you're right. But I'm afraid I'll have to brave it for the good of the Inquisition. You'll have to give me some styling tips, one day. Your hair always looks impeccable. You have a marvelous sense of style for a hardened warrior."

He rolled his eyes as he headed to the door. "Why do I even-"

The mages were easily dealt with, mostly the young and the infirm who had fled the mobilisation. Evelyn knew that they were still traumatised by the Magister, but having an Aequetarian mage as the Herald convinced the older ones that the Templars were not there to persecute.

They were assigned some of Cullen's ex-Templar soldiers as guards, which seemed to settle the matter. "We'll let them be for now," Evelyn said, walking away from the barracks tents with Cullen at her side. "Just keep the uniformed Templars away from them if it makes them jumpy. Best we also not bring them to the Breach tomorrow. We'll keep our contingent small."

An elven messenger ran up to her. "Herald, Mother Giselle has asked for your aid. Some of the dying from Therinfall are calling for you. They want to speak to the Herald before they... before-"

"Me?" Evelyn blinked. She paled slightly. "Because I'm the Herald. Right." Prayers from the dying, as if she could giftwrap them and deliver them to the Maker. But she could not say no. She steeled herself. "I'll be there shortly," she said. The messenger left.

"Excuse me, Cullen," she said. "I must- I must go." She left him in the snow, not seeing the look of concern on his face.

The soldier was young, injured at Therinfall when they stormed the keep to sweep up after Evelyn and the others. He looked no older than fifteen. He lay in Mother Giselle's makeshift infirmary, where cots lined the walls of of a large tent lit by braziers. Mother Giselle stood by the bed of the dying soldier as Evelyn went up to him. The boy looked up at her as she knelt down. His eyes sunken, his skin pale and his lips parted with ragged breath. His chest was a crisscross of bandages, the smell of blood from him could turn the stomach.

"His name is Even," Mother Giselle said.

"Herald," he breathed, reaching out to her.

"Yes," she said, taking his hand hand as she saw knelt by his cot. She held his hand in both of hers, realizing that his fingers felt so cold.

"Aching, burning, pain blooming like a flower. It hurts." Cole stood by by the cot, unseen by all except her. "Fear inside, what will happen to me? Mother, help me. Where will I go when I die?"

Evelyn wished Cole would stop. She willed back the tears. "I'm... I'm scared, Herald," the boy wept.

"I know, dear," she said comfortingly. "You're afraid."

"Will she be there?"

"Who?"

"Andraste."

Evelyn felt the words stick in her throat, her mind blank.

"Just say yes," Cole said. "He's going to die anyway. Words to make him happy, whole..."

Evelyn bit her lip. "Yes," she said to the boy. "She will be." Evelyn shut her eyes. "Let me sing the chant for you," she murmured. His grip on her hands tightened. She touched the boy's hand to her forehead as she prayed Chants that she never knew would touch her so closely. "O Maker, hear my cry: Seat me by Your side in death. Make me one within Your glory, and let the world once more see Your favor. For You are the fire at the heart of the world and comfort is only Yours to give." She could hear the boy crying as her own tears fell. "May Andraste guide you to the Maker's side, Even."

Mother Giselle touched her shoulder and Evelyn stood, laying the crying boy's hand by his side. "Are there more?" Evelyn asked, her voice shaking.

"If this pains you…" Mother Giselle.

"I am fine." She wiped her eyes with the hem of her sleeves. "Please, Mother Giselle, let me speak to them."

There were more to pray with, and she did so, each prayer stained with tears. The dying, some old, some young, believed in her and the cause of the Inquisition. She prayed with them all. And the weight of it bore down on her. Cole's words guided her to give them comfort. But the boy always slipped out of sight and mind.

She walked in a daze away from the infirmary, her mind clouded by weighty thoughts. She passed a fireplace in the snow between two tents. Varric sat on a bench by the fire with a cask at his side and a stein in his hand. "Andraste's ass, Sparky," Varric said, looking at her. "You look like you've been through the wringer. What happened? Did Curly finally drop his stutter - among other things."

She smiled at the dwarf. "He doesn't stutter, Varric," she said. "Not all the time. And what else is he supposed to drop, exactly?"

"You really want me to say it?" he asked, reaching behind the bench for another mug, which he passed her. He filled it from the cask.

"What's this?" Evelyn asked, taking the mug he handed her and looking down into the golden liquid within. It hit her nose like a sledgehammer.

"Hirol's Lava Burst!" Varric said. "It's kind of-" Evelyn drained the cup in three sips. "Strong."

Warmth bloomed inside her as the drink went down. She shuddered, relishing it. "This will help me sleep," she grinned at him and laughed at the shocked expression on his face. "What? We drank in the Circle too, you know. You won't believe the moonshine the Tranquil can brew. I drank Antivan Honey Trap once and lost track of three days."

Varric grinned and refilled her cup. "Can't imagine the Herald of Andraste running around drunk for three days," he said.

Evelyn sat down opposite him at the fire. "I wasn't the Herald then, I'm still just me," she said, sipping the drink. "I think, anyway. All this shit is weird, I don't know where I end and the Herald begins anymore."

"You're not kidding. All the weird shit you've been through? I wouldn't know what day it was if I were you. Part of me kind of hope this is a dream, that we'll wake up and find it's some bullshit Fade stuff."

Evelyn laughed darkly. "It  _is_  bullshit Fade stuff, but not the sort you can wake up from. Still, tomorrow we seal the Breach and hopefully everything goes back to being nice and normal and I don't have to be Herald anymore."

"You're starting to sound like you don't want the job, Sparky."

"Can't imagine anyone would! Can you imagine the interviews?" She gestured with her cup, puckering her lip imperiously. "You there! Mortal! I need someone to close this hole in the sky - nasty business, you know - and then maybe lead the whole world to peace and happiness and rainbows. You're hired! Here's a magic mark! I want reports every week!" She snorted. "I can see the queues of people who'd want that job."

Varric laughed. "You don't know the half of it, Sparks. You might find there are a lot of weirdos who think that they can do this. Sure! Demons! Who cares, right? Knock 'em on the head and they go away. Now pay me money!" He refilled her cup.

She laughed. "Trust the dwarf to think of stipends! I never even considered that." She blinked when she thought of Even. She drained her cup. "They couldn't pay me enough. I don't care what everyone says, the Maker should have found someone better than me. But I'm the sod that's got the mark. I'll have to do." She handed the cup back to Varric, her cheeks pink from the drink. "I'd better not drink too much. Got a Breach to close tomorrow. Can't work with a hangover."

"We'll continue when you fix that hole in the sky, Maybe break open another cask. Sera's Friends put us in touch with some Butterbile."

"Maker's tears, that stuff kills people!" Evelyn exclaimed.

"If it's good!"

She laughed and bade Varric goodnight, walking slightly unsteadily back to her cottage. She collapsed on her bed in the warm glow of drink. She was asleep a moment later and the nightmares once more embraced her in their fold.

 

++++

 

Do you want to see Evelyn battle the Breach and Corypheus? Or would you like to explore her journey as Inquisitor? Leave a comment and let me know!


End file.
